notes

I built Alfie while believing we shouldn't outsource our thinking to AI. Those two things sat badly together for a while.

For now, I'm sitting here: AI is very good at holding structure for us to think inside. For neurodivergent people the hard part usually isn't the thinking. It's task inertia, knowing what to prioritise, knowing what the small first step is. And we've often already learned about the structures that would help. There are just far too many of them so remember the 'right' one when we need it.

So Alfie is an opinionated selection of the frameworks, rituals and practices that actually work for a neurodivergent mind. Partly delivered through AI, not because it understands you, but because it can ask the right question at the right time. Alfie's chat features are deeply anchored in clean language, narrative practice and exception spotting.

==Alfie isn't here to fix you. It's here to be with you and mirror back your words, so you can make sense yourself.==

Give Alfie a try? https://withalfie.com

A friend asked me today, "Why do you think so many people feel disconnected?" I said something like this: we have all this technology in between our relationships. We text rather than talk. Even if we share a space, there's often a phone or a computer somewhere, a screen screaming at us.

How often do you actually sit around a table and share stories like we did at dinner? There were no phones out, just us having a chat. It was small enough so we could actually connect with each other.

Instead, before breakfast, we open social media. In minutes, we see dozens of versions of who we should be, who we could be, and people telling us how to do things and what to do and when. When you get all of that and you haven't even had your coffee yet, it can be very hard to remember who you are and what you need.

What if we don't strive to be a good person, but just a good-ish person? What if doing good-ish things, good enough, is maybe an easier and more fruitful way to be?

Because it allows us to be in a growth mindset, rather than saying, "oh, this person just told me I'm not good enough, and therefore I'm bad." It could be, "oh, this person just told me I don't know something. I can learn here."

So, good-ish. When we always assume we're trying to do something good, sometimes we might not know better. People tell us that. It makes us ask questions. It makes us say, "oh, thankyou, tell me more." And it always opens a door for more conversation. It opens a door for something to grow.

How can I do more of the "oh, thank you, tell me more. What's in there about that? Help me understand"?